Happy Christmas Harry

“No one puts Baby in a corner.”

-       Patrick Swayze, Dirty Dancing

I was pretty lucky that my school decided to send all of their students to Scout Camp (Makajawan) on Christmas Eve and Day. Here’s the buildup to the birth of Sweet Baby Jesus.

If you can’t beat em’, take a motorbike

There’s only one road to get to the school from my apartment. It’s a pretty busy road; you pass two temples and a major market going towards it. Construction began on it about 6 months ago and doesn’t show signs of stopping. On a normal day it will take me about 15 minutes to get there. On a bad day, about 40.

Tuesday is my day to do “English on Stage,” where a Thai teacher and myself will teach an English expression at the morning assembly. This starts at 7:55 AM. The previous week I was almost late because traffic was so terrible. I anticipated bad traffic again so I left early. The taxi ride goes fine until we get within a kilometer of the school (yeah, I say kilometer now) before hitting absolute gridlock. 20 minutes go by and we’ve hardly moved. I start getting a little antsy. Reason being:

1.      The gas meter is a solid inch below empty. We’ve been in this taxi for at least a half hour. I have no idea how the car hasn’t run out of gas yet.

2.      I have to be on stage in 5 minutes.

Somehow sensing I’m close to being late, the taxi driver flags over a motorbike and tells him where I need to go. I hop on the motorbike and we easily weave through the stalled traffic. We arrive at the school and I check my watch. 7:55. I pay the driver 15 baht and sprint to the stage. The Thai national anthem begins to swell as I take my place backstage. The assembly has just started. I’ve made it.

In typical Thai irony, the director gave a long speech to the students, a teacher was honored for being promoted, and another teacher taught the school a few Thai phrases – all before I went on stage. 40 minutes had passed before we explained what, “I was working my tail off” meant. Mai pen rai.

SANTA’S COMING! OH MY GOD! SANTA’S COMING! I KNOW HIM! I KNOW HIM!

My school goes hard in the paint when it comes to Christmas. The English Department was in charge of putting on a Christmas skit for the school at the morning assembly. The main act was a song and dance number set to Mariah Carey’s (and Justin Bieber’s) “All I want for Christmas is You.” Earlier in the week, I was told that all native English teachers would be auditioning for the “lead” dancer. There were about 16 students and teachers dancing but one English teacher would be at the very front of the stage. I go the audition after school early in the week. The dance choreography is based completely off of this video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vdfh1es9QAs

I’m hit with flashbacks to YAMO/Brillianteen while trying to quickly learn these new dance moves. I looked terrible but the students were cracking up. Anyway, no other teachers ended up auditioning so I got the lead part. Like I said, I’m on the fast track to being a star here. We rehearsed the dance and skit all week after school.

I woke up at 6 AM on Friday to get some extra practice in. I was feeling awake, calm, and confident. I arrive at school dressed in pajamas for the skit.

 My “wife” (another Thai teacher) and I go on stage and wish our daughter (a student) sweet dreams on Christmas Eve. She asks if Santa’s coming that night. Duh. We put her to bed and exit the stage. I quickly put my Santa Claus costume on top of my pajamas. I tried it on the previous day but had never danced in it. It was a little loose around the waist but the legs were tight, so I figured I should be fine.

Mariah Carey starts to sing with her golden voice and the dancing begins.  I’m killing it. My finger snaps are straight out of West Side Story. My arm circles could get me into Cirque de Solei. I’m feeling really glad that I spent an hour dancing to a youtube video by myself.

A big roar comes from the crowd and I see more fingers pointing in my direction than usual. I look down and realize that my pants are at my knees. The pants slipped out from under my belt and were too big to sit comfortably at my waist, so they fell. I look like I’m halfway in a red potato sack with my pajama pants exposed.

I frantically try pulling my pants up while dancing at the same time. This holds for a few seconds and then falls back down to my thighs. My dance moves start falling apart. The other teacher I’m paired with grabs my pants and holds them while dancing.

So now this looks completely ridiculous- she’s holding my pants up while trying to dance, and I’m trying to dance while being held on to at the waist. We eventually make it through three and half minutes to thunderous applause from the audience.

But the show isn’t over. A teacher dressed up as Santa rides his motorbike around the students, yelling out various Christmas catchphrases. Once he dismounts, another teacher and I pretend to be his reindeer as we go up the stage. We couldn’t really think of how to be reindeer, so we copied the horse trot from Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Here’s a visual reminder.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L9nXfffeAIU

The rest of the assembly was mellower. We threw candy into the crowd and the students went nuts. I went on stage and asked questions about Christmas, giving prizes to those who answered correctly.  After the production ended we posed for pictures with teachers and students. I didn’t take these but they are some of the most painfully funny and awkward photos I’ve ever seen. Enjoy.

"THROW YA HANDS IN THE AIR, IF YOUZ A TRUE PLAYA."

I have no idea why my eyes are closed in all of these

I got several compliments on my performance from the other teachers. They thought it was a hilarious idea to drop my pants in front of the whole school. I had to quickly explain that it was an accident and I didn’t really mean for it to happen. They tended to ignore that and patted me on the back instead. A star was born.

Has anyone seen Alan?

This weekend a couple of my friends came into Bangkok. We decided to mix it up and go to one of the rooftop bars in the city. We settled on Sky Bar, which is 64 stories in the air and the tallest point in Bangkok. It’s also where they filmed a portion of The Hangover Part II – it’s the scene where Chow gets arrested by the police.

When you get off the elevator they take you a waiting area. You have to buy a drink before they let you see the grand view. No problem, we’ll just get a drink right? The cheapest one was 350 baht – about $15. Gotcha. That’ll blow the bank account pretty quick.

The view of the entire city was incredible. This was easily the nicest bar I had ever been too and it was filled with a pretty swanky crowd. It was nice feeling like a baller for 45 minutes.

The Old City

With the day off on Monday, we decided to do some traveling. Our destination for the day was Ayutthaya. This is the old capital of Thailand and is famous for its ruins and monuments. It’s only about an hour away from Bangkok so it’s perfect for a day trip. When we got there we were hounded by the local tour guides who wanted us to use their services. We initially intended to just get around on foot for the day so we just walked away from the tour guides. They followed us and ended up cutting their price by 2/3. We relented and got a driver to take us around to the all the key areas for the day. I guess literally walking away is the best bargaining technique.

The town was awesome. I felt like I was in an Indiana Jones movie as we walked around the ruins.

The Buddha in the tree

A really, really long Buddha

Next week I’m up to Chiang Mai for New Years. Merry Christmas to everyone in the states! Wishing I could be back but also very happy to be here. 

And just for fun- 

Mark

Lost in Translation

“Open the pod bay doors, HAL.”

“I’m sorry, Dave. I’m afraid I can’t do that.”
– 2001: A Space Odyssey

“Do your best and forget the rest.” – Tony Horton, P90X

Whoa, double quote! Short post this week. Read on for why.

Writing for fun?

I wrote a really long post earlier but realized it was mainly venting about a bad day I had. Nobody's got time for that. So I deleted it.

The bad day occurred because I still don't fully understand how the Thai school system works. Every day brings new expectation for my role as a teacher. Some days I'm proofreading a worksheet for another teacher, other days I'm writing a test for hundreds of students. I'm learning to embrace these assignments with short notice and learn from them.

To process some of these rough days, I've started writing a "paper" about the Thai education system. Yeah I know, I can't believe I'm writing a paper for,err, fun. But it's so vastly different from the American system that I figured I should  write down some of my observations so I don't forget. Anyway, this has been really good for me to identify challenges I've had in the classroom and how to overcome them. I plan to do the same thing about the American education system when I get back to the States. Who knows, it might even end up in a book. You heard it here first.

Check, please

I went out to dinner the other night some other English teachers at the school. Streets in Thailand are filled with little shops and restaurants. I love going out with people who are familiar with the area because they know these great little places I would never find. This one was hidden behind a large building off the main road. It had this little garden and pond next to our seats. It was very serene.

I followed suit with everyone else ordering and got pig’s neck. It was actually really good, regardless that it was about 90% fat. In an effort to make the restaurant homier for us Farang (foreigners), the owners put a Beach Boys album on over the stereo. I love Thai people.

You know nothing Jon Snow

For the first time in three years, I will not be bringing home a fantasy football trophy this winter. In the most improbable of all situations, EVERYONE on my bench outscored EVERYONE I started, and I ended up losing by 4 points because my opponent had two players from the Bears (Thanks McCown and Jeffery). The irony is terrible. It must be a rule that you can’t win at fantasy if you’re out of the country or something. Yeah, that’s it.

Randos’

Here are some funny things I’ve found around the school and the area. They pretty much speak for themselves.

The students came up with this for a team name. So proud. Sorry my handwriting still sucks Mom.

Next week all the English teachers are singing and dancing to “All I Want for Christmas Is You” in front of the whole school. I’ll see if I can get someone to take some pix.

Mark

P.S. Sorry the text formatting is so bad. I've tried changing it but the website sucks and won't let me. It's also all in Thai. 

P.P.S. David is currently traveling around Europe. It’s sad that these two sentences are Davis’ longest blog post in the last month. 

Tis' the Season

“All I do is party. Ha ha ha ha.” – "Bounce," MSTRKRFT

Like I said last week, December is full-on Thai holiday mode. With the king’s birthday last week, Constitution Day this week, and Scout Camp, Christmas, and New Year’s coming up- the celebrations won’t stop for a while. To get festive I bought my first (and hopefully last) fake Christmas tree. I give myself points for trying.

"That's a sad lookin' Christmas Tree Charlie Brown."

King Day

The King is highly revered in Thailand. Everyone loves him and speaking poorly of him will land you in jail. As such, his birthday is a huge deal. People have the day off work to relax and be with family. It’s also is the same day as Thai Father’s Day. I had a minor freak out when someone told me this; how could I miss that Father’s Day was coming up? Anyway I remembered/researched that American Father’s Day was a couple months ago. Whew. I’ve got another few months before I can go through this again.

I met up with some friends and we headed into downtown Bangkok for the King’s Birthday. The protests weren’t happening that day out of respect for the king. That being said, there was a ton of police out to make sure nothing got out of hand. Thais filled the street dressed in yellow, the color of the king.

We ended going to Siam Mall. This is one of the most high-end malls in Thailand and it was beautiful. How often do you see a Formula 1 car hanging out?

Most of the day was sent exploring and seeing the various shops the mall had. We didn’t really end up spending much- it was pretty pricey. We lucked out and found a movie theater that was playing Catching Fire in English. It was great. Very exciting and included a standout performance by my girl Jennifer Lawrence. You looked great out there honey. Call me.

Before any movie in Thailand  begins, the Thai Royal Anthem is played. Everyone is expected to stand out of respect. This is true about the National Anthem as well. The National Anthem is played every morning at school and sometimes randomly on the streets. If it’s played, you’re expected to stop walking and stand still until the anthem ends. As a result, you see people frozen in place for several minutes and then see them start walking again in unison immediately as it ends. It’s kind of like a reverse flash mob.  

Stoop Kids on the Stoop

I’ve mentioned before the small convenience store right next to my apartment. It’s run by a small family and is sort of a gathering place for the neighborhood. There’s a patio out back that’s filled with a sporadic stream of children, teenagers, and adults. Sometimes another teacher and I will go there to enjoy a beverage or two and hang out with the crowd. Most people there can’t speak English and I can’t really speak Thai. But we’re able to trade a couple words and it ends up being fun.

Last week I met a local guitarist nicknamed Jack. He loves American songs and quickly grabbed his guitar and started playing. I was pretty proud that I could bust out every word of “Country Roads” by John Denver, much to his surprise. We ended up swapping songs and singing Thai renditions of American music. Somehow I ended up showing him how to play the one song I knew on guitar- “Wagon Wheel.” I’m pretty terrible at playing guitar. I played it about three times slower than it should  go. But he was able to pick it up and within minutes he could play the whole thing. All these ASP skills coming in handy.

The shop usually hosts parties once a month too. Here’s a birthday party they held a couple weeks ago.

Later that weekend I saw Jack again. He told me that he played “Wagon Wheel” at a gig the night before. Awesome.

Nickname?

That makes me realize- I haven’t talked about nicknames yet. All Thais have an English nickname that they’re given as children. Most of them have no meaning or significance behind them at all. Most are simple like "Bow," "Fern," "Ice," or "Benz." These are usually what I call my students because their Thai names can be difficult to pronounce. I have to keep my immaturity in check when I call on “Poo” and “Pee.”

Well, that’s the week. I’ve locked down plans to go to Chiang Mai for New Years. Chiang Mai was dubbed "The Chicago of Thailand," so I really can't go wrong there. The rest of the month should be pretty mellow as I have to save up some Baht to go. But that's OK- I just found a website that has every episode of The Sopranos. 

Mark

P.S. Sean Klamm - don't worry, I'm cranking these out on a weekly basis. We see you.

A Very Thai Thanksgiving or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Eat a Ton of Food Anyway

“I am a foreigner in a foreign land.” – Moses, Exodus 2:22

Last week marked the beginning of the holiday season with Thanksgiving. Or so I hear, as no one in Thailand had any idea what it what it is. It also didn’t really feel like Thanksgiving because it’s 70 degrees and sunny every day. I also had to work on it as well. Very surreal.

Many teachers at the school would ask me what Thanksgiving is. I had never really thought about it before.

“Well, it’s a great holiday. Families and friends all get together to celebrate everything they are thankful for. You eat tons of food the whole day. You just eat and eat. Football is on all day as well as Star Wars/James Bond/Band of Brothers TV marathons.

The premise of it is kinda BS though. It initially began as a celebration for a great harvest and friendship between the colonists and the Native Americans. But the colonists sort of killed most of the Native Americans and stole their land. So yeah. It’s come a little ways since then.”

Homesickness hit me a bit knowing that all my family and friends were back in Evanston. But whatever, it’s Thanksgiving. It’s the holidays wherever you are.

I started out by just stuffing my face with food the whole day. Extra rice at breakfast. A snack of potstickers. Some green tea with lunch? Why not!

I had plans to meet up with some other Americans to get Western food but they fell through. So I turned to the most American place I could find- KFC. I loaded up on fried chicken, mashed potatoes, and French fries. I got a Blizzard from Dairy Queen for dessert. Fun fact: the “Large” here is like a “Small” in America. I debated getting the largest size, “Take Home,” but figured I’d feel completely worthless if I ate it all by myself. Got home and skyped the parents. Boom. Thai Thanksgiving completed.

Thankfully Thais are as crazy about Christmas as Americans are. The mall next to me was completely decked out in Christmas decorations the day after Thanksgiving. It was very comforting to hear the Thai version of “Jingle Bells” as I bought my laundry detergent.

All in all, a very different but enjoyable Thanksgiving. Christmas music is blaring in the apartment and I’m on the prowl for a Christmas tree. I’ve finally learned my lesson not to listen to Christmas music until after Thanksgiving. I started two days before Halloween in the fall of ’10 and peaked way too early. Like Orson Welles.

Anyway, here’s some other stuff going on.

Trouble in the Streets

Some of you may have heard about the anti-government protests that recently turned violent in Bangkok. Most of the stuff you read on CNN is fairly accurate for what’s going on. The protests are pretty isolated and in downtown Bangkok, near the government buildings. I’m not near them and don’t plan to go near them, so don’t worry. The US Embassy Twitter is keeping me in the loop.

Runnin’ Down a Dream

As I’ve mentioned before, exercise is a foreign concept here. My apartment is located right on a highway, so I didn’t really have any place to run. I had resorted to running around my parking lot since I wasn’t aware of any other options. This gained me some notoriety in the neighborhood. When I went to the local market the other day, the woman who owned it smiled and pantomimed running motions. I’m Usain Bolt baby.

Another teacher told me of a good route I could take. I ran down a road near me, Sai 5, which had roads open enough for running. Every person I passed would turn their head and stare as I went by. It’s pretty funny; they’re just not used to anyone running. There’s also a bunch of shops, restaurants, and bars, so I’ve found a new area to explore.

School Dayz

Today at the morning assembly, I found out it was National AIDS Awareness Day. I don’t remember ETHS observing this day when I was in high school.  Students carried banners to the stage and held cut-outs of cartoon condoms. I can’t make this up.

Once on stage, a girl sang a song to the school. It had to do with AIDS I’m assuming. After that a small skit was performed. I couldn’t understand what they were saying but it was hilarious. It showed the negative effects of AIDS- from teen pregnancy to eventual death. That sounds very morbid but it the acting made it very humorous. Following that was a lecture from the director about the disease.

It was fascinating seeing the frankness in which the school talked about sex and AIDS. STI’s are a huge problem in Thailand, so the school deals with it head on. I’m sure this would never fly in an American school. If people are upset about the Common Core Standards, I highly doubt a dancing cardboard condom has a chance.

Well that’s all for now. Davis is in the midst of Cambridge finals, so he should have a monster post soon. Do it Davis, or I'm not getting you that Nimbus 2000 for Christmas.

Mark

This American (Thai) Life

Bob Slydell: You see, what we’re actually trying to do here is, we’re trying to get a feel for how people spend their day at work…so, if you would, would you walk use through a typical day, for you?

Peter Gibbons: Yeah.

Bob Slydell: Great.

Peter Gibbons: Well, I generally come in at least fifteen minutes late, ah, I use the side door – that way Lumbergh can’t see me, heh heh – and, uh, after that I just sorta space out for about an hour.

Bob Slydell: Huh? Space out?

Peter Gibbons: Yeah, I just stare at my desk; but it looks like I’m working. I do that for probably another hour after lunch, too. I’d say in a given week I probably only do about fifteen minutes of real, actual, work.

-        - Office Space

Right now I’ve been in Thailand for just over six weeks. I’ve kind of got a groove down for how daily life goes. Here’s a few things that’s been happening with me around the ‘Nakhon.

Started Listening to Jazz

I think I was watching a movie that has jazz and it really clicked with me recently. Josh Phillips called jazz “Mathematical Music.” Cool. I already feel myself becoming more sophisticated.

Learning Thai

I’ve been trying to learn a little bit day by day. It’s a little tricky since Thai is such a tonal language. Nearly every day I have to take a cab home because the bus can take hours to come. As it happens, I have to tell the taxi driver how to get to my apartment on a street called Bang Toey. I had problems getting home initially because I’d say BANG TOE-EE. They’d look at me like I was crazy. I had to call a teacher once and tell the driver where to go.

I can now say it correctly – BANG TUH-EE. It makes getting home a lot easier.

Crushing it at Work

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=no6uSdvBlCI

Weight Watchers

I was putting a shirt on Saturday night before going out and looked in the mirror. I looked stupid in it. I put on another shirt. Still looked stupid. I cycled through a few shirts before I realized- they were big on me. I think I’ve probably dropped at least five pounds since I’ve been here. This sort of makes sense though.

Thais serve smaller portions for meals, so I’ve just been eating less at meals and snacking more. Cosmo Men’s Health tells me that’s good for you. Also with teaching I’m just walking around all the time, burnin' those cals'. Some of my guy friends here said that they’ve had the same thing happen. The girls seem to be gaining weight though. 555.

Watching TV

I love a good show. Wi-Fi works in my room. It was match made in heaven.

End of the Mourning Period

The mourning period for the death of the Supreme Patriarch ended as of Saturday. For the last month, everyone has had to wear black, white, or grey in recognition of his passing. Since I packed approximately zero white or black shirts, I went out a couple weeks ago and bought a white and a black shirt. Since then I’ve been alternating between the two every other day. Luckily my students see me once a week so I don’t think they’ve caught on.

Today I found out that I shouldn’t wear red or yellow shirts, as they align with two combating political parties right now. I just can’t win with colors here.

Becoming a Thai Pop Star

At each morning assembly with the entire school, there is a short segment called “English on Stage.” Two English teachers will read a brief conversation to the rest of the school. A Thai teacher will then translate the phrase to the students. At the end of the month, they hold a short competition during the assembly. They ask questions about those conversations and reward correct answers with prizes.

Before that happens, the students need to be gripped with fun of the English language. Last Wednesday I was told that I needed to help sing a pop song on stage. I would need to memorize it and sing it with a few other young Thai teachers on stage. It was an Australian pop song from 2008, “The Show” by Lenka. I still don’t know how certain songs get popular here.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=elsh3J5lJ6g

So I memorized the song and was ready to nail it the next day. As we’re about to head on stage, I’m handed bunny ears to wear. All the other teachers are wearing bunny ears too. I put them on. I’ve given up asking questions at this point.

My defining moment as a teacher

We start singing and the other Thai teachers begin doing this choreographed dance. Again, missed the memo on the dance. I tried to copy what they were doing but I looked pretty terrible. Then we stood on stage for ten minutes while the students answered questions. The bunny ears were surprisingly comfy. 

I seem to have made a lasting impression though. Later that day three students asked me to take individual photos with them. I’ve got skillz.

Well, that’s Thailand for now. Happy thanksgiving to everyone back in the States!

Mark

I don't see nothing wrong with a little Loi Krathong

“Shine bright like a diamond. Shine bright like a diamond. Shine bright like a diamond.”- Rihanna, “Diamonds”

This weekend was Loi Krathong which is one of the largest festivals in Thailand. I made plans to meet up with some friends in Sukhothai, where legend says the festival began. Actually the legend was debunked and it started somewhere else. But their festival was supposed to be huge.

I left work Friday and headed to the bus station. After getting one of the four tickets left, I embarked on the 8-hour bus ride to Sukhothai. Thai buses are essentially like a Greyhound/Megabus. There are more amenities if you pay for the nicer ones (Free food, less stops, etc.). They usually show movies as well. This was my second time taking a bus and they played Fast and Furious 6 again. Apparently Thais love the Fast and the Furious movies. When you consider how crazy Thai traffic is, the irony is too much.

Anyway I got in a little after two in the morning. My friends Eli and Nicole live only about an hour and half away by motorbike; so they had the night to explore the city a bit. They picked me up by motorbike and we crashed at the hotel. Also, this was my first time on a motorbike. It was awesome. They’re essentially mopeds that are common everywhere in Thailand. Motorbikes are usually used for local transportation but can go up to 60 mph as well. I’m tempted to buy one if I can get it for cheap. Ignore that last sentence mom.

The next day we got up and visited the “old city” of Sukhothai. As you may guess, this was the older part of the city that had ancient ruins preserved within its walls. It was full of green fields, rivers, old statues, and monuments. Vendors and food stalls lined the roads that were surprisingly cheap. The area was also decorated with lanterns, wreaths, and other ornaments. We wandered around the ruins and soaked in the atmosphere. Also, for some reason, music from The Lion King was blasting throughout the place. It was the music that plays when Mufasa dies. Really random.

Later in the afternoon, we stopped by a free Muay Thai fight and martial arts show. Muay Thai boxing is basically boxing except you can use your legs and grapple more. I was a little shocked when I saw that kids would be doing the boxing and martial arts. However, it was just a show and the all the hits were staged. I guess a Thai version of the Hunger Games on a national holiday wouldn’t go well for anyone.

May the odds be forever in your favor.

That being said, it was really cool to see the kids fight with wooden swords and rods. They were very talented and it was well choreographed. Some even blew fire. I wish I could blow fire.

After walking around for a while, we decided to sit down and get some dinner. As we’re sitting down I see a large group of white people. I don’t usually see a lot of white people these days. As I look closer, I realize that it’s Andy (my friend from Dayton) with his Fulbright friends. Neither of us had talked about our plans that weekend, so it was a really crazy coincidence we ran into each other here. Like really crazy. There were hundreds of food stalls and thousands of people. I’m still sort of weirded out by it. But it was fun to catch up with him briefly and say hi to the other Fulbright crowd I had met before. 

We decided to stop by a bar outside the city until the fireworks began in two hours. It was fairly mellow but we did see an elephant pass by.

In typical Thai fashion, we realized that the fireworks happened about a half hour earlier than they were supposed to start. But the main reason for coming back was for the lantern release. Thais light lanterns and send them into the sky. The purpose is to let go of one’s misfortunes and pray for good things to come. It was beautiful to see all these glowing orbs drifting through the sky.

We got some more food after that (we’re becoming true Thais, always eating) and then went back to the hotel. The bus ride back the next day was another long 8 hours. Luckily they played Fast and Furious 6 AGAIN to keep me occupied. When the bus stopped, I realized that the final stop was not the bus station I was at before. No big, I was planning on taking a taxi back anyway. I got to the taxi line and realized that there were no less than 60 people in front of me. Cabs seemed to come once every few minutes. Great.

I stood there in a line only a few minutes before a Thai man started talking to me. He asked me where I was going and I tried to explain the landmarks near my apartment. He smiled and motioned for me to follow him. He called over a cab driver who wasn’t in the queue and told me to head off with him. The cab driver was great and got me home in less than a half hour. Such a nice act of kindness to end the weekend on a great note.

The one thing I missed this weekend was seeing the actual Krathongs. The Krathongs are little ornaments with candles that float down the river at night. This is to celebrate the end of the rainy season. I got back a little too late Sunday night to see it but the trip was worth it.

Here are a few other random things this week:

-         I realized that everyone carries white-out with them. Everyone.

-        Since all the classrooms are open air with no screens, birds sometimes fly into the classroom. It’s OK because they usually just fly out the other side.

-        I’ve started drinking coffee a little bit. If I drink it black it’s not bad for you right?

-        Tried doing yoga every day in the morning. Got two mornings in. I like sleep.

This week I’m trying to find an actual Muay Thai fight to go to. I’m also searching for a place that will serve Thanksgiving food- I need stuffing to make it through December.

Mark

P.S. No post from Davis for a while. He must have stumbled upon a new number.

The Ills

“If you like your plan, you can keep it.” – President Barack Obama

Well, I finally got sick here in Thailand.

I wasn’t sure if I was going to write about it but I think it’s an interesting look at the Thai health system. You might say some of it has “too much information.” You also might say that it’s a deep look in to the soul of a conflicted man wrestling with disease in a foreign country. Take your pick.

Last week I was afflicted by rapid bowel movements. There, I said it. Let’s be adults about this.

Last Friday night I met up with some friends on Khao San Road in downtown Bangkok. We had a fun night catching up and enjoying the nightlife. The peak of the night was going to “The Club.” Sean Klamm, when you visit, I’m taking you there. It’s everything you’ve ever wanted.

The last time I was on Khao San Road I had the best Pad Thai I had ever eaten. So good I ate two plates. We tried to find the vendor on the street but no luck. I settled for some Pad Thai from another guy down the road. It was alright.

The next day was terrible. I was running to the bathroom every hour or two. I was trying to think of what could have caused it. Then it hit me - the Pad Thai. This is what I get for settling for crappy Pad Thai. Don’t ever settle kids. You’ll end up like me.

Sunday was even worse. I was getting chills and a fever as well. That afternoon I threw in the towel and called up one of my co-workers and asked what medicine I should get. In Thailand, pharmacies sell antibiotics over the counter without a prescription. Luckily there is a pharmacy in the mall 5 minutes down the road. When I got there, I put my friend’s wife on the phone (she speaks Thai) and gave it to the cashier. They were able to set me up with antibiotics and some electrolyte packets. All for the cost of….90 Baht ($3.00). Not bad.

By Tuesday, word had spread around the office that I was still feeling sick. All the teachers kept telling me to go the hospital. I kept trying to explain that I really wasn’t sick enough for the hospital but to no avail. Midday, two teachers grabbed me and said we were going to the hospital right across the street during my break. Onward!

Hospitals in Thailand are very different than in the US. It’s essentially a combination of an ER, medical clinic, and pharmacy. The Thai teachers were able to translate and I filled out some paperwork when I arrived. After that I waited around until I saw a nurse. Same as in the US, I got my weight and blood pressure taken, explained my problems, etc. I saw the doctor pretty quickly after that. She knew English and prescribed me a different medication. Went down to the pharmacy and grabbed the meds for 80 Baht. It took an hour and half to see the doctor on a drop-in, get my medicine, and get out. That’s what I call a one-stop-shop. Again during all of this I was overwhelmed by the gracious help of the other Thai teachers. They really are incredible people.

In my head I started calling trips to the bathroom in my head, “Incidents.” I had just seen “The Incredible Hulk” and that’s what they call it the Hulk transforms. Bruce Banner turns into a giant green monster and breaks stuff; I prevent nuclear fallout in my pants. Same thing.

The rest of the week went fairly well until Thursday, when I felt an “Incident” coming with a few minutes left in class. I had about 45 seconds to take action. I had two options:

1.      Pop a Pepto Bismo. Waddle around for a few minutes until the feeling goes away. This usually buys me an hour or two.

2.      Begin a comfortable jog to the restroom.

I jammed my hands into my pockets. Cell pohone, house keys, and 20 baht in coins. No Pepto Bismo. Guess we’re going with option 2.

“You all did a great job today!” I yelled, dancing around. “I will see you all next week! Class dismissed!”

I hastily threw my books into my briefcase. A couple students tried talking to me but I brushed them off as gracefully as I could. I then began a full sprint to the downstairs bathroom with, “THANK YOU TEACHHHAAAAA,” echoing in the background. I made it. The world was happy and as it should be.

A week later I’m pretty much back to normal. Quite an interesting experience. I’ll be watching street food with a closer eye from now on.

This weekend I’ve pretty much just been hanging out around my apartment. I’m saving my money for next weekend, which is Loi Krathong. Loi  Krathong is a large Thai festival that occurs every year in November. Thais make tiny raft decorations to float down the river and hang lanterns to celebrate the end of the rainy season. Apparently it’s very beautiful.

Next weekend I’m heading to Sukhothai, where legend says the festival began. I’m meeting up with about 10 other CIEE people, so it should be a fun time. The downside? 7 hour bus ride to get there. Ouch.

Before I end this post, here's a few random Thai things I don't think I've mentioned.

Eating with Spoons and Forks

Thais use fork and spoons, except there’s a big spoon used in the right hand and the fork in the left hand. The fork is used how westerners use a knife. When I was first here I was chided often by servers for using a fork to eat most of my food. Knives don’t exist.

Chopsticks

They only really seem to be used for more formal dinners. I haven't managed to completely embarrass myself using them yet. I can use chopsticks better than I can golf, which isn't saying a lot.

555

555 is the Thai equivalent of LOL. Why? In Thai, the number “5” is “haa.” So if you laugh like, “ha ha ha,” it sounds like you are saying “5” over and over again. Thus, 555=LOL.

Next post will probably be a little delayed as the weekend travels will keep me busy. I also came up with a goal for next week. I’m going to wake up every day before work and do yoga. When in Rome right?

Actually I don’t know anyone here who does that. I’m just giving it a whirl.

Mark

P.S. Nice post Davis. I don't have anything witty to say. It was a good post.

  

In and Around Cambridge

"I love deadlines.  I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by." - Douglas Adams

Okay Mark, I know you have some sort of degree that makes you qualified to string words together, but all your blogging is making me look bad.  Don’t you have like 49728132 students to teach?  At least wait until my Self-Writing Quill comes in the mail before you post again.

Anyway, I should explain why it’s taken me so long to post (again).  Unbeknownst to me, my accommodation changed at the start of the year and so I've been busy dealing with that.  Don’t worry – my mailing address is still the same, it’s just that I now pretty much live here:

Home sweet home

It’s probably safe to say that I’m doing more homework now than I ever have in the past.  The mathematics course is structured in a way that requires one assignment per subject to be submitted every two weeks.  Since I’m studying six subjects, that evens out to about 3 assignments per week.  Each assignment takes about 10-20 hours to do, so when you calculate the average number of hours I should work each day…I try to think about something more cheery.  Thankfully, I love the stuff I’m learning and the lectures given are very interesting, so there’s only a small probability that I’ll go crazy before Christmas holiday!

Still, in the time not spent scribbling indecipherably I've managed to:

·         Buy and read a few chapters of Wolf Hall, which seems to be my parents’ absolute favorite book ever which “You just have to read because it’s so well written and parts of it reference Cambridge and you’ll be living in England and oh it’s just such a great book” (sorry Mom and Dad, couldn’t resist).

o   It actually is a great book by the way.  You should definitely read it if you haven’t already.

·         Get a “Loyalty Card” from the coffee shop for all the time I’ve been there.

·         Try black pudding (and immediately regret it).

·         Realize I’ve inadvertently been stealing juice from the dining hall for three weeks (I thought it was free, I swear).

·         Stake out a permanent spot in the library, complete with this imposing stack of books:

I've only opened three of them

• And finally, do a bit sightseeing:

To London!

Last Monday, I went to London!  For about 90 minutes.  I had to go into London to pick up a bag of clothes that was waiting for me there (thanks Aunt Julie, you’re the best), so after lectures ended that Monday I set out.  Getting out of class at 1:00, I grabbed a sandwich from the dining hall and walked to the train station, where I took a train into Liverpool St. station, transferred to the Metropolitan tube line for a few stops, and then walked a block to the building to pick up my bag.  I had a little extra time before I had to leave, so I walked around a little more and found this place on Baker Street:

….which was conspicuously sandwiched in between 237 Baker St. and 241 Baker St.  I’m no Sherlock Holmes, but if I had to guess I would say it’s probably not original. 

Unfortunately, at this point I had to catch my train back to Cambridge, so I did the whole thing again backwards and made it back in time for dinner!  Not a bad afternoon.

To Formal Hall!

This past Wednesday I also had a chance attend a “Formal Hall” which is a weekly dinner put on by King’s College where every dresses up and the food served is especially nice.  However, there are only 138 seats (for 430 students), so you have to buy a ticket in advance – which doesn’t sound so bad until you realize that everyone is trying to buy a ticket at the same time.  The ticketing process is absolutely mad.  Tickets are bought online and released at a specified time, but about five minutes beforehand the internet starts to slow down or grind to a halt due to the huge load of students refreshing the page.  By 2:30 (when they go on sale), the website is all but broken and it’s simply luck as to whether your page will load. 

Acceptable behavior when buying a formal ticket

Now that I think about it, this must seem peculiar to a tourist visiting the college.  From about 2:25-2:35 every Thursday, they will see the usually busy campus becomes devoid of students.  Then after this period all of the students will return to whatever they were doing – some buoyant, others clearly frustrated.

Fortunately, I was able to secure a ticket during this electronic free-for-all and attend the formal.  I would say what was on the menu, but the name of each dish was so complicated that I’m sure what they were (even though each was delicious)!  However, after a starter, main course, dessert, coffee, and plenty of wine, our group left the dining room full and happy.  I’m sure I will be going back for many more formals in the future – that is, if I can get the ticket.

To [Assorted Cambridge Destinations]!

One of the most amazing things about living in Cambridge is that there are so many unique and historic sites in such a small geographic area.  I mentioned two pubs in my last post about some famous pubs in Cambridge.  I’ve had a chance to stop by both so here’s a bit about them!

About a week ago, I stopped into a pub after getting dinner with a group of maths students and was surprised to see a plaque on the wall stating that the pub had been around for over 400 years!  This place, the Pickerel Inn, also claims to have been a favorite of CS Lewis (when he worked at Cambridge at the end of his career) as well as JRR Tolkien (in his visits to the university).  Although packed on the Friday night of my first visit, I’ve gone back during the week since then and found it to have quite the cozy atmosphere, with an interior sporting low ceilings, heavy wooden beams, and old tables that (in the words of one online reviewer) “have soaked up centuries of history and beer.”

The Eagle Pub's "RAF Bar"

On the topic of historic pubs, I need to also mention “The Eagle,” which is on the same block as my building.  Opened in 1667 and located across the road from the university’s physics laboratory, The Eagle’s claim to fame comes from the discovery of the structure of DNA in 1953.  At that time, The Eagle was frequented by many university scientists, due to its proximity to the lab.  For this reason, when Watson and Crick discovered the famous “double-helix” shape of DNA, they announced the findings to their colleagues by standing on a table and claiming that they had “discovered the secret of life.”  Their work on the shape and structure of DNA has led to the development of modern genetics, and to this day the pub serves an ale called Eagle’s DNA (which unfortunately doesn’t taste all that great).  

Another cool historical fact about the Eagle is its heavily graffiti-ed ceiling.  During the second world war, the pub was home to air force regiments that came and went through Cambridge.  During this time, many airmen burned their name and short messages into the ceiling knowing that there was a good chance that they may never come back.  These scorched messages exist to this day and can be easily read in the part of the building now known as the RAF Bar.

Finally, I just want to make a quick note about the previously mentioned physics laboratory.  Cavendish Laboratory (now known as Old Cavendish, since the lab was reestablished at a new, modern site in the 1970’s), is a compound of buildings adjacent to King’s College and is home to hundreds of world-changing discoveries.  Although most research activity now occurs in the new site, Old Cavendish is still in use and is where I go three times a week to attend lecture.  Being the science nerd I am, it’s still somewhat awe-inspiring to walk among the maze of old buildings, loading docks, and exquisitely carved archways, knowing that some of the most brilliant scientists in history did the same. 

On the first day of class, the lecturer began his overview by stating that the aim of the course was to understand how electricity and magnetism were interrelated by understanding and applying Maxwell’s Equations, which are the cornerstone of the subject.  This lecturer was speaking in a building housed in Cavendish Laboratory, which was founded by the very same James Clerk Maxwell.  Numerous plaques pepper the compound, reminding students that many of the theories and methods they study today were discovered in the very place they trudge to, half-asleep, each morning. (Check the end of this post for some famous discoveries made in the lab).  Although Cambridge has battered me with schoolwork since my arrival, it’s reminders like these that keep me so appreciative and grateful for the opportunity to work in such a unique place.

I’d love to write more about my studies right now, but I’ve got to return to the library and get back to work!  There’s really no way around it – studying at Cambridge demands a huge time commitment.  I just hope that after doing math exclusively for a year, I don’t forget how to read and write.  So let me no if I dont right very good!

Cheers,

David

___________________________________________________________________

P.S.  Here’s a list of some people who have worked in Cavendish, along with one of their well-known discoveries:

• Lord Rayleigh (discovered why the sky is blue)
• JJ Thomson (discovered the electron)
• Ernest Rutherford (discovered that atoms have a nucleus)
• William Bragg (Bragg’s Law of Diffraction)
• Arthur Compton (Compton Effect, directed portions of the Manhattan Project)
• James Chadwick (discovered the neutron)
• John Cockcroft (First researcher to “split the atom”) [Also, my class is held in the Cockcroft Lecture Theatre]
• James Watson, Francis Crick (discovered the structure of DNA)
• Dorothy Hodgkin (discovered the structure of penicillin and vitamin B12)
• And many, many others